I’ve always loved clothes. My mom and (most) sisters loves clothes. Even my grandmother loved shopping. I come by this honestly. Some of my youngest memories were getting to go thrift shopping with the money I got from my Grandma when I cleaned her house. I was taught the value of money, thinking about cost per wear (CPW) and so on. However, in the past two years, I’ve let these lessons go by the wayside. I’ve felt pressure to shop more, buy more expensive clothing, wear new things on the blog. None of that pressure was coming from someone in particular, but I justified shopping as basically getting content for my blog.
Dress: EXACT (Size reference: Large) // Very Similar
Earrings: EXACT // Ring: EXACT // Shoes: Similar
Bag: EXACT
I’m not blaming blogging, but I truly think that I have spent more on clothing in the past two years than I would have otherwise if I wouldn’t have been blogging. Some of the items I justified as being unique pieces for the blog, haven’t even made it on the blog! I noticed that in the past four months as I’ve traveled more for work, I’ve been stressed, needing more control of my life, I’ve started impulse/ emotional shopping. Not even big things, a shirt here, a skirt there, but truthfully, that over four months added up to about $375. What would that cover? A student loan payment AND an extra car payment.
Here’s how I’m stopping the cycle of emotional shopping
- I’m not doing as many outfit posts on the blog
Thanks to the results so far of the reader survey (take it HERE!) you all have expressed an overwhelming desire for me to do more lifestyle and personal posts. That means I have less pressure to have a new outfit together in order to put up a post. YAY! I didn’t realize that I would feel such a sense of relief when I saw these results; in fact, I almost wish I would have asked sooner because I feel like a burden has been lifted.Dress: EXACT (Size reference: Large) // Very Similar
Earrings: EXACT // Ring: EXACT // Shoes: Similar
Bag: EXACT - I downloaded Mint
I swear I am NOT an affiliate of them but I cannot tell you how much I love this app. For banking I use Bank of America and have synced up my accounts in Mint. It categorizes every single purchase and funnels them through my budget so I can see how much I have left for each category, automatically without me having to do any work. I also LOVE that on Sunday I get a breakdown of the last week’s purchases, right down to the place I spent the most money, what day I spent the most and how I can use the leftover money at the end of the week (HAH! If there is any) to work towards my savings goals.What are my biggest weaknesses right now? Eating out lunch during the workweek. Lunch is consistently inconsistent for me. Sometimes I am able to go to the 12:10 gym class, sometimes I’m on a call, sometimes I just need a solid 20 minutes away from the chaos. I am notorious for packing a lunch, looking at it, saying I don’t want it and then going to Chipotle. So not outright emotional shopping, but it’s still a weakness of mine that I am working on curbing. I am not being paid by Mint, but I would sell out in a second for them. Just kidding. - I am focusing on experiences rather than objects
I am not ashamed to say it, at one point in my life I would openly admit that I would rather have objects over experiences. That time was as short as two years ago. I took comfort in “things” and didn’t see the value in experiences that will provide a lifetime of memories. Something clicked last year and I became much more interested in having experiences, to include turning my phone off more, leaving it at home when eating out and other things. The problem though was that I wasn’t scaling back my purchases, so I was shopping AND having experiences that sometimes costing more than I had anticipated. So far I haven’t found myself emotional shopping for experiences. - My mom’s “one item in, one item out” rule
My personal rule for clothing has always been that if I haven’t worn something in six months, I have to donate or give it away. Six months allows for two seasons and generally doesn’t allow for any sort of wiggle room for excuses. However, my mom has an even better rule, if she buys something, she has to get rid of something. Right now I have NOTHING I want to get rid of! So guess what? That means I have nothing that I need to get and cuts down emotional shopping. - Realize what my emotional shopping triggers are
What do bored, stressed, sad and happy have in common? Those are the moods that I find myself emotionally shopping. Each of them has a unique way of impacting the emotional shopping but I’ve noticed I start browsing during these moods and sometimes result in a purchase. I’ve started asking myself WHY I am online shopping (sometimes out loud) and WHY I am making time to browse. This will allow me to curb spending and also be more productive with my time!
Dress: EXACT (Size reference: Large) // Very Similar
Earrings: EXACT // Ring: EXACT // Shoes: Similar
Bag: EXACT
A lot of you so far from the survey have asked how I managed my money and budget related to shopping. I’m going to give you an update on my emotional shopping after the first quarter of the year. I hope to have really great news but I promise you that whatever the result is, I will share with you and be transparent about this weakness and let you know some of the things that worked and didn’t work.
Do you have any tips? I’d love to hear your thoughts!
Rachelle
good for you, emotional shopping is real and I had to stay on top of that so I know the struggle, Happy to see you have a plan. Also you look stunning in your navy wrap dress we are twinning.
xo
Pinksole
Tara
It can be so easy to fall into a bad pattern with shopping, I’m trying to cut back too! You look gorgeous in that dress 🙂
Sevi
I cannot wait to read all of your lifestyle and personal posts. Don’t get me wrong, I love all of the outfit posts. There is something about getting to know a blogger you really enjoy on a personal level that is just so much fun.
Also, Mint is a lifesaver! My husband and I used it to create our budgets, save money, and monitor our spending habits.
Closet Fashionista
I’m a huge Mint fan as well! I’ve had an account for at least 3 years, probably longer. Super helpful!
This year I’m going to try to cut back on ALL my shopping so I can travel a lot more. But I always slip up somewhere, haha.
http://www.closet-fashionista.com/
Karly
Good for you, girl! I think knowing your triggers/weaknesses and budgeting are key – that’s what usually keeps me on track. Don’t forget to reward yourself once in a while, though. If you hit a goal or a big milestone, it’s okay to treat yourself to something!
Bri
These are such good ways to focus more on buying only what you need or really really love. Downloading mint totally changed my life last year – seeing where the money goes when it does is such an eye-opening experience! It was tough to keep to in December with holiday shopping, but I’ve jumped right back on the bandwagon this January!
Pamela
I’m right there with you on the shopping thing! I’ve spent way more on clothing than I usually would and I’ve bought things I haven’t even worn more than a handful of times all because of the blog. I’m trying to do more lifestyle posts this year too. These are all great tips for sure! And yes to experiences!! <3, Pamela Sequins & Sea Breezes
Laura @ Walking in Memphis in High Heels
Such great inspiration because I know these are where I spend my money the most too – food and shopping! So excited about 2017!
Maddy
i totally understand this. I put unnecessary pressure on myself to have awesome creative outfits for the blog, when in reality, many of my readers are on a similar or smaller shopping budget than I am. I’ve gotten into the habit of asking myself “Will this item actually make me happier?” and generally the answer is no. I managed to walk out of Nordstrom empty handed on Saturday because of this. I need to continue to sell pieces I no longer wear, but I have a much better feeling about my emotional shopping for 2017. I can’t wait to hear how your first quarter goes.
xo, Maddy
http://cassidylou.com/
Amy
I am definitely guilty of emotional shopping! I see ties to it and blogging as well. These are great ways to work on it. We use mint as well. Having a budget definitely helps me.
Amy Ann
Straight A Style
Kate @ Green Fashionista
Girl I’m the same way about shopping! That dress is stunning on you, and loving that bag too <3
Green Fashionista
Erica
Girlie, I can totally relate. I’ve never been a big shopper but over the year last year I got sucked into buying more and more just because it felt like it would make for a great outfit for the blog. I decided to make changes to my shopping habits for the year both to get back to my core values (also a big supporter of experiences over stuff) but also for environmental reasons. Check out my pet project for 2017!
Erica
http://pumpsandpushups.com/introducing-project-less-waste/
head to toe chic
yes, I definitely think I’ve spent more money because of blogging. I’m also with in that I’m trying to spend more money on experiences!
xo,
Angela
Shira
I get the pressure of wanting to buy for the blog. I’ve dealt with this a lot, especially this past year as my weight changed and none of my clothes fit me so I couldn’t mix and match like I used to. It’s been tough. I really need to work on being better with spending and you have some great ideas.
http://asequinloveaffair.com
Morgan @ The Messy Bun Mama
I love that you’re taking into consideration what your readers want! I love your blog regardless though 😉 And those shoes are just amazing.
The Messy Bun Mama
Adri
Number 5 really hits! I’m trying to not buy anything this month (clothing or shoes) unless I actually need it, which is highly unlikely. But asking why I’m looking online is something I should start asking myself.
xo Adri
http://www.adrilately.blogspot.com
Jackie
Emotional shopping is definitely no joke. I’ve come to realize that I do that too and I truly am trying to cut back. It’s hard though. I really am addicted to shopping and blogging does NOT help that!
Jackie
Something About That
Shannon
I need to do your mom one item in one item out rule! I am the worst at cleaning out my closet! You look stunning! In love with this dress!
<3 Shannon
Upbeat Soles
Maggie Shirley
I was a really terrible emotional shopper in college (because I was especially emotional). I would buy things even if they didn’t fit quite right or even if I didn’t have anything to wear them with because “Well, if I lose five pounds this will fit perfectly!” or “I’m sure I can find a skirt in this exact shade of orange that will match this tank top even though I never wear skirts or tank tops, but it will be great and maybe once I find it I WILL wear skirts and tank tops!” It was ridiculous. I finally realized what I was doing, and have found a rule that really works for me: When I’m in the dressing room, if I don’t IMMEDIATELY love something, I don’t get it. If I even have a moment of doubt, I take it off and put it back on the rack. If I find myself still thinking about it days later, I’ll go back and try it on again, but that’s happened maybe twice. Usually it never crosses my mind again!
StacieDaisy
$300ish in a few months is a great accomplishment! I don’t even want to see how much I’ve spent! 😉 PS I do have mint but choose not to look!
Laura
I love the one in-one out rule and typically abide by it. It really helps keep my closet from getting too overwhelming and helps cut down on impulse buys!
Lisa
What a great post. I don’t blog myself but I can certainly relate to the emotional shopping issue (presently getting it back under control again). I can easily see how having a blog would put extreme pressure on someone to have new items constantly. Just reading some blogs caused me to purchase items I really didn’t need lol. To be honest, I really love posts that show how to mix and match and reuse items in multiple ways. So things you own and have worn before making a reappearance is very OK with me. The plan you’ve come up with is a great one, although I personally struggle with the one-in-one-out method. Wishing you the very best for success and I’m looking forward to whatever The Adored Life has in store for us in 2017. Happy New Year!
Ashley
Fashion blogging really does make you feel the need to shop more! I can totally relate. I love these tips and always try to do the one in one out rule as well. It helps!
Alissa
Yes! I need to really, really start re-wearing and being creative with my closet.
Sara
Oooooh love this dress on you! I definitely got more into shopping because of blogging. There’s this need to have the newest thing and it’s something I’ve dealt with too. I’ve come to realize that I don’t need to always be shopping or always show the latest thing I bought. I can remix cute things that I already love! I used Mint for a while and then stopped, but I should get back to it! I need to save my money haha!
~Sara
Alissa
I LOVE Mint so I cannot say enough how much I enjoy it, definitely download! Also, <3 you girl!
Maya
I <3 you so much! I am totally feeling the same, with blogging I always feel pressure to keep buying clothes , so I'm so happy to see that you're stepping away from it too. I've been doing more lifestyle posts and trying to get creative when it comes to mixing up old pieces I love, so hopefully it will help me save some dough! xx
Alissa
I <3 you even more!!! I've really enjoyed your lifestyle posts too and I feel like that's probably because you don't have the pressure!
Jessica
The wrap dress looks great. Doing monthly budget posts has really helped my shopping.
http://tresfly.blogspot.com/
Alissa
That accountability definitely helps!
Naomi
I find that when I am stressed out about money, it makes me want to shop more, too. What kind of wacko impulse is that?!
Alissa
Girl, I just stressed out and found myself browsing Nordstrom. I can’t even with myself!
Kimi, Cotton Cashmere Cat Hair
I can TOTALLY relate to the increased shopping due to the blog. My weakness is finding things I love on blogs I follow. I have to constantly remind myself that just because I like it and it looks pretty doesn’t mean I need to own it. I’m looking forward to seeing your progress! I hope to also stop shopping as much and plan for more experiences. 🙂
Alissa
I think the one thing that really saves me lately is that my body type isn’t like a lot of people and so I know that a lot of stuff isn’t going to look the same on me!
Kylie
I am a total emotional shopper too! And I DEFINITELY buy more and justify it for the blog. But I love the ways you’re curbing it! And now I really want to try Minted.
xo Kylie
http://www.dressinsparkles.com
Melanie
So pretty! x
http://www.wanderlustboulevard.com
Alissa K
I can’t afford to shop so luckily I don’t lol but I just discovered Mint too and I need to download it! I feel like it would help me so much!
Alissa
http://www.naturallymeblog.com/
Keira
Oh man, I feel this so much. I think I use my blog a lot to justify my emotional shopping, so I’m stepping away from the pressure of regular OOTD posts and sharing more lifestyle content like you mentioned. I’m trying a first-quarter shopping fast to reset some of my bad habits and get re-inspired by my closet. I’m so happy I found your blog through Writes Like A Girl! 🙂
Patricia
….hmmmmm…..what was that I said in the last post comments? “I bought a bunch of new clothes”? Did I say that? If I did does it mean I can’t buy more? Did I say it made me feel better? this post hit so close to home it hurt to read it. I am an emotional shopper, up, down, in the middle, no matter how I feel I love to shop. I like to look at fashion, see what’s new, imagine if it would look good on me, think about if I need one of some to round out my wardrobe ha ha or what I like to call a wardrobe. I only go to dr appts & out to eat, which are both about these last 2 blogs! lol I like the fact that I can sit comfortably on the couch & shop & the stuff just appears at the door, if I’m lucky! I need to check out Mint, that would be a big help! ty for being you, for writing such inspirational subjects. You help keep me in touch with myself, something I’ve needed a lot of lately! <3 luv ya girl