I’ve avoided writing the following words. The Adored Life has been a wonderful chapter of my life. The chapter where I purposely wrote about my hopes, fears and struggles about college. I purposely wrote truthfully so that someday when I was struggling with life I could look back and see what I had come out of and survived. I am so glad I did because I am now at that period of needing to look back and seeing where I’ve come from.
I started blogging for the fun of it. I never cared about the statistics, money or anything else. I just did it for myself. I didn’t care about anything but the pure fun of blogging. Somewhere along the way I lost that. I got caught up in checking my stats every single day. I got caught up in buying more and more and more new clothes because I felt like I had nothing to offer otherwise. I started attending blogger events and comparing myself. I looked down on others because they weren’t, in my head, as in the game as I was. I got so incredibly caught up in the superficial aspect of wearing pretty clothes, offering a funny story and my ego being stroked because someone liked my outfit.
I got to work with so many great companies. I was so thankful for the relationships I made. Some of my best friends have come from blogging. You have helped me get through so many struggles. In so many ways I tried to keep going because I felt like I owed you it. You, my great, wonderful, loyal readers totally helped me.
Sweater: Gap (similar)
Hat: Target (exact)
Pants: Nordstrom Rack (similar)
I’m so sad that I really got caught up in the shallowness of the blogging world. That I cared more about my statistics and became one of those people who based their self esteem on something that could be so fickle. I’m ashamed that I just got so caught up in *the game* and lost sight of who I really am. That shallowness extends into my life and I have got to take some time to become the Alissa I was and know that I want to be. I don’t want to focus on things such as how many times I’ve worn a shirt, the brand I am wearing, anything like that. I want to be the happy, confident, ball-busting woman that I know that I can and want to be.
Blogging was never a job. It was a fun hobby. I allowed myself to think entirely too much of myself. No one is going to freak out if you miss one post. This isn’t a job. It’s been a fun, fun hobby but it’s not a job. When you start to look at blogging from a business perspective it can take out all of the joy. There is a life beyond blogging. Perhaps the next year will bring me back to blogging but I know that for right now, it’s time to focus on other things.
Blogging was never a job. It was a fun hobby. I allowed myself to think entirely too much of myself. No one is going to freak out if you miss one post. This isn’t a job. It’s been a fun, fun hobby but it’s not a job. When you start to look at blogging from a business perspective it can take out all of the joy. There is a life beyond blogging. Perhaps the next year will bring me back to blogging but I know that for right now, it’s time to focus on other things.
I love all of you. All of you who have reached out to me and asked where I am, I can’t thank you enough. I considered just trying to keep things light around here but I respect you too much and want to always be honest with you.
It’s been fun. I might be back in a few months. 2015 could be a great year and I will come back stronger than ever. I’m not sure for now. It’s hard to know how to end this sort of post. It’s hard to know what’s going to happen in the future. What I do know though is that I’m going to use this time to really focus on what matters and becoming the woman I want to be.
Alice Warren
I have really enjoyed reading your posts and your great style. I will miss seeing your pretty smile in my bloglovin reader. Fashion blogging can get carried away with the latest trend, brands etc. Glad you were able to stop yourself and focus on what's important to you.
Take care and hope to see you back!
Alice
http://www.happinessatmidlife.com
Elegance and Mommyhood
OK, so I stopped in today (finally) to congratulate you on your new job. I have been reading, but too busy to comment, sorry. I am shocked and sad to read this post. But when you know it's your time to leave it all behind, than do so. No one can give you better advise than your own self. I am glad you are following your dreams and listening to your gut. I have seen your blog and style evolve and your blog wasn't just a little blog anymore. Your collaborations with Plato's have been awesome because you have created some great outfits with those second-hand pieces. I have enjoyed following and reading along for as much as I could. I am not gonna lie, sometimes I just saw your outfits. I don't always have time to read every single post of every single blog I follow. You are real, extremely stylish, sweet, beautiful inside out and such a smart girl though. I know you will go places. Hope your new career is everything you want and 2015 is an even better year for you Alissa!
Way to go out on such a stylish note too. Love this Fall Look. You nailed the Plaid Blanket Scarf worn with a Fall Hat Look.
Much Love & Hugs and sending you great vibes <3 Ada.
Rachelle (http://pinksole.com/)
Oh no Alissa I will miss you. But you are right This is not a job, it's just a hobby. I do hope that you will take a step back and come back stronger next year. Through this blogging journey we just have to remember how lucky and fun it can't be. This year I purposely avoided a lot of blogger events, so I understand you more than you think. Keep in touch xoxo
Nina Piccini
I felt the same way which led to me closing the book on my blog. Take a break and see how you feel, enjoy life, wear your clothes you own, do a shopping ban to force yourself to get creative and be appreciative of what you have. Those things worked for me 🙂 I hope you are enjoying your new job, your boyfriend and the beautiful fall weather!
xoxo, Nina
Taramixandmatch
Sad to see you go, but I wish you the best! Let me know if you need anything!
Inge Jane
Good luck with everything, Alissa! I've always enjoyed following your blog. You can still enjoy your style and fashion without the blog, as I've been finding this last month. I respect you for writing this post. I've been on the fence about my blog lately, but haven't known what I've wanted to do about it. So I know it's a tough decision.
Laura B
Your fabulous outfits and hilarious posts will be missed! Best of luck with everything in the future!
Karly @ Miss in the Midwest
Best of luck to you, lady! I will greatly miss you, your outfits and sense of wit – I'm only sad I didn't find you sooner so we could have been connected for longer. You will be missed by many, but I/we hope for the best for you! Xo
Closet Fashionista
I'm sad to see you go but I totally get where you're coming from! Blogging/being perfect all the time can totally consume you if you let it. So it's good that you're going to back away and let your true self come back out. I'm not at that point yet, but I'm sure one days soon I'll realize that I've changed and am not myself anymore.
I'll definitely miss your funny stories though! 🙂
Kristina
You'll definitely be missed Alissa, good luck with everything!
Libby G.
Alissa you should be so proud of everything you've accomplished! What makes you stand apart from other bloggers is your sincereness and honesty, and I know so many of us appreciate you being sincere with your readers! I'm so happy to have worked with you and I hope to do that again in the future! Good luck with life in KC!
Libby
Stylin' Iowan Blog
Kiki Mincks
So sad to see you go. In the short time I've been reading your posts I've found them very inspiring, entertaining, and full of life. I hope you find your way. (:
http://accordingtokiki123.blogspot.com/
Krysten Quiles
I could have written this. I just got my first experience with mean girls through blogging and have realized that I've been associating with the wrong people and doing the wrong things. And it makes me full of shame because blogging is my love and my passion. How did I fall to the wayside?
I hope you come back. I enjoy your blog so much and will miss reading your life. So I want you to know you will be missed.
Kari
Oh, Alissa. Your words ring so true to me, and I really admire you for having the confidence and strength to step away from the blog. Blogging appears to have morphed into something different these days. Instead of being a fun way to meet new people, it feels like it's turned into a never ending competition. I get caught up in it, too, and it's hard to get back to what's real and true. Hang in there. I still hope we can hang out, because if there's anything that blogging has brought me it's been a way to meet fun people in KC. Stay in touch, pretty lady:)
Bree Aylwin
You will be missed! I truly enjoyed your posts. The outfits were great, but more then that I enjoyed your great fun witting banter! Your posts alwyas made me smile. I know how easy to is to get caught up in it and think it is great your wise enough to step back for awhile to reevaluate it
All. Good luck to you Alissa and I really do hope we see you back here soon!
Jasmin daily
Adore you for this post, it is so true we do get caught up in the numbers rather than the content of our blogs. Happy you are taking out some time for yourself but also have my fingers crossed you will post occasionally in the near future. Thanks for so many of my morning giggles reading your posts and for the recent email exchange.
xo, Jasmin
http://www.jasmindaily.com
Leaving the Corner & Dipping My Toes
It is pretty sad to see you go, but at the same time it's nice to know your reasons behind it, we all hope you find everything you are looking for, and get to enjoy this coming holiday season with your family and all the things happening in your life. We will miss your smiley face and funny posts, but you have to do what's bets for you and what makes you happy 🙂
Cheers to an awesome blogger and a great person
Natalia
Jessica
Don't mind me, just tearing up over here. I'm texting you lady!!
Breenah A
The important thing is that you still get in touch if you ever come down to Wichita because, blogger/ing or not, I still really want to meet you! And my parents still have a fire pit 😉
ravenlocks
Aw…I've been there. Blogging full time really is a job. But I just want you to know that I've always enjoyed reading your posts and looking at your outfits. Hope you'll be back soon 🙂 I'll keep checking back anyway.
Talk to you soon <3
xo Azu
http://www.raven-locks.blogspot.com
baublestobubbles.com
This was an amazing post to read, Alissa. I love how honest and truthful you've always been in your posts, and that's definitely a breath of fresh air. I keep rereading what you wrote, because this week has been particularly low for me, and it's really because I'm feeling down about my blog and the pressure I put on myself because of it. Hopefully you can have some good away time and just let yourself enjoy life like you said. Good luck with everything, and I hope to see you back soon! 🙂
Lindsay Truax
Thank you for sharing. Will miss your smile.
pinkandnavystripes.com
countrygirlcityfashion
I said "Oh no!" outloud when I saw the title of this post. Your blog is always the one I am most excited to see each day in my Bloglovin' feed, and I'm going to really miss your posts. 🙁
However, I completely understand what you're going through, and I definitely support this decision to step back until a time comes when you can blog for the sake of blogging again. I hope that time is soon, and I will be eager to start reading again!
Laurie
God Bless your endeavors whatever they may be! 🙂
Andi
Aw, I will miss you, but I understand! Best wishes to you in whatever your next chapter is!
Tracy
As a fellow KC girl, I LOVE your blog!! I hope you take some time for yourself and come back!!! love your style and your personality!! oxoxoxoxo
PS – WHERE did you get your purse? 😉
Sarah Lagen
Sending you love girl! Go follow your dreams and do what is right and best for you!! 🙂 You deserve it!!
Jeans and a Teacup
I have to say this post makes me sad…your blog is one of my favorites! I think – for it just being a hobby for you – that you turned this space into something amazing! I totally understand your reasons for taking a break – and thanks for always being so open and honest. That's what we love about you! I hope that you come back someday!
XO
Jessica
Maria M.
As always, thanks so much for being honest, being real, and being you! I totally get needing to take a break, and while I'm sad to see you go, I'm excited for you as you move on to the next adventure 🙂
xo
Maria
Danielle Doerr
This makes me so sad because your blog has helped me keep in touch with you! However, I can totally relate to this! I've been feeling like I've lost my voice too.
kate @ a journey in style
Aww, and I just found your blog! I wish you nothing but the best!
Nicole Layne
I love your blog, but I totally understand the need to take a break. It is so easy to get caught up (I find it happening to me…) and I love this reminder to stay true to yourself (easier said than done). Good luck and I hope you come back!
Nicole
Nicole to the Nines
tastefulstyleblog.com
I was actually just thinking about you and hoping you were having fun wherever you were. I've loved following along on your journey, but real life comes first. I wish you all the best, and I'd love it if you returned to blogging someday. Rock on, pretty lady!
Ladies in Navy
🙁 i have been missing and thinking of you. i hope that all is okay and that you know that blogging or not you can always write to me or reach out to me. i want to give you your space to grow and heal and find yourself. that's always more important than publishing on the web – but i will sincerely miss you. <3 you're very loved here on the blogosphere and elsewhere in the "real" world ;). remember that.
LyddieGal
I'm so sorry to hear you are giving up the blog (for now). You always make me laugh, smile, and inspire me. I admire you completely, and I hate to hear that you felt like you were losing yourself to the perceived competitiveness of blogging.
I can understand where you are coming from, blogging has given me an overwhelming desire to shop more, and spend more than I ever used to or thought I would. I never thought I would care about how many comments I received but I feel a little twinge of disappointment when a post doesn't do as well as I would like.
However, feelings change, fashions change, life changes. I hope you keep in touch and I will keep you on my sidebar forever and hope to see you posting again. If not, people should still know to go and check out your always fashionable, often hilarious, amazing archive.
Chic on the Cheap
Hannah Rupp
I'm very sorry to see you go. It's kind of funny, but I just started following you yesterday. Your outfits (and probably your hair – mostly your hair) kept popping up in my recommended Pins on Pinterest. But as a style blogger myself, I completely understand your reason for leaving. You do you, girl!
Darcy
I will miss seeing you in the blogging world! I hope one day you will find your way back. It is definitely hard to not get all caught up in the business of blogging. I have to remind myself I can't compare my blog to someone who gets paid to dedicate 8 hours to it a day, whereas I get one hour a day for fun haha. I hope to see you around!
xo,
Darcy
http://www.amemoryofus.com
Sara Strauss {Sincerely, Sara}
I completely understand where you're coming from! Sometimes it's hard not to get caught up in all of the nonsense! I'll miss you blogging and seeing your outfits and reading your hilarious remarks, but I know it's the best for you right now and that's wonderful that you're doing that for yourself! Hope you come back in 2015! 🙂
~Sara
Rachel Lynne
PLEASE PLEASE come back eventually! I know what it's like to get caught up and need a break. Last year around this time, I was only posting one, maybe two outfits a month. And then I came back to post more regularly, but never as much as I was before my break, but I prefer it that way. I still check my stats more often than I should, but taking that break allowed me to relax. Blogging is a fun hobby and every time I'm not having fun, I step back from it again. It can be SO easy to compare to other bloggers, I always wonder how they look so perfect, can afford so many new things all the time, take perfect pictures and for everyone else who does all of that on top of a full time 40 hour a week job (or more) or being a mom, I just can't even imagine. I can barely keep up with it some days, and I'm not engaged or married, just really busy at my full-time job and being social as often as possible. Long story short – I feel you and I hope you are doing everything you need to do for yourself! Take care and keep it touch please! (and please do come back) 🙂
Pat
Dearest Alissa, this blog probably more than any other one you've written has touched me. Maybe because I only knew from one of my dearest friends, Debbie W, or maybe because I've only known you through this blog, I've never seen or had any inkling that you were struggled so much with what you described as "getting caught up in the shallowness of the blogging world". I feel sad I never connected with that, I would have loved to help you in any way I could. Maybe though, it just means, while you thought you were so caught up in all of the competitiveness, there was and still is a beautiful part of you that shined above all else, the confident young woman I've come to know. Your humor is wonderful, you love to life so evident, your kindness pores from every soul of your being, your candidness about those parts of life unsaid so brave in such a huge forum.I don't doubt you have struggled with some of the aspects of blogging, and being present for all of your fans and newbies even when you're having a rough time of it yourself. What I admire more than anything is your willingness to open up to all of us, to admit what you feel your failures to be, and to have the courage and more importantly the smarts to leave it behind. Maybe for now. Maybe forever. Whatever you do, do not feel you are letting those down by not coming back for those who profess they will miss you. Of course we will miss you. But we should all be routing for you, and singing nothing but praise for your strength to see what you need to do. Never apologize sweetie, especially when you see growth in your near future. Only you know whats honestly best for you. I'm more in awe of you and more proud of you than ever. So take those baby steps, take those big breaths. Take a nap. ha! Remember I am ever so grateful for my gf Debbie, for sharing with me a new friend, one that I will know is out there living her life to the fullest. Even if you leave your blog for a long time, I have faith in you that you will be strong. I love you girl, and feel so lucky to know someone just like you. <3 much hugs and kisses sent your way <3
Melissa
I'd miss you so I hope you won't stay away forever. I really liked your blogging style, always enjoyed coming over to your little place. Though I think you're making the right choices for yourself, blogging shouldn't be your job, it should be fun. Take good care of yourself, big hugs from me! 🙂
xxx
http://www.rockinheels.com
Photos from Nola Foulston
You look perfect! Love the fall outfit and the hat is outrageously awesome. Miss you.
TheTinyHeart
Sad to hear this but I can understand how blogging can become more of a chore than a fun hobby. I really do hope you will come back to blogging in the future. Will miss reading your posts!
-Sharon
The Tiny Heart
Visa Giveaway!
Ginny MyNewFavoriteOutfit
So, this post didn't show up in my feed, I just thought of you so I clicked over and saw this. I wish you the best, and I'm sure you'll look fabulous doing it!
Tania Franco
I will miss you prety smile, but will be rooting for you all the way. I hope you will be back stronger than ever. I can relate to all that you are saying. Sometimes we forget there is a real life out there we need to live, and be present. I applaud you for doing what you feel is best for you, and hope you will find that balance of living a wonderful life out and in the blogging world.
Much Love,
Tania
http://inspiremyfancy.blogspot.com/
Jackie
I've been behind on my blogging (And the blogs I read) so I just came across this post now.
I totally understand the struggles that come with blogging as a hobby. It's a tough thing to stick to your guns and be true to yourself without getting sucked into the "selling out" aspects of blogging that can come up.
I do love reading your blog and I'm sad to see you go, but hopefully you'll still be around on Insta! It's much easier to stay up to speed in a busy life (or so I find).
All the best,
Jackie
Something About That
Anna Baun
I have had very similar conversations with myself – even more lately – about getting so involved in this process and the superficialness that came come with blogging. I have considered many days lately closing the site down for the exact reasons so please know you are not alone. I hope to see you back soon as I love your blog as a place to come and smile! You have always managed to do that regardless. Much love! I hope these next several months are incredibly rewarding for you! Hope to hear from you soon! XO
Anna
alilyloveaffair.com
Always Maylee
I totally get it. Ever since I had my baby, my views and perspectives on everything has changed, including blogging. Not only did I not have the energy to take outfit photos anymore… I really didn't want to. Not when I had more important things to focus on, like my beautiful little one. I hope you do come back, because I really enjoyed reading your posts, your humor is a breath of fresh air!
Hopefully you'll stay active on other forms of social media, like IG. We can keep in touch there perhaps!
xo, Yi-chia
Always Maylee
Tiffany Ima
I get it! I want blogging to eventually be a job, but I know what you mean by getting caught up in the shallowness! Good luck and we do hope you come back!
Alyson
not sure if I replied to this in the past but good for you. it can really be like that and I had a moment recently where I felt the same, where I felt reminded about the direction i wanted for blog content (stuff women really want/need to know, not all this fashion crap) and it feels good to be reminded. Will miss seeing your beautiful self here so often but happy for what lies ahead!!
alyson
Rebecca
Hope to see you back with your witticisms Alissa – Wishing you the best of the holidays too!
Rebecca
http://www.redtagchiclosangeles.com
Priya
I can't believe I never commented on this! I totally understand, and who knows, maybe blogging can be something you pick up again casually in the future! Thank you for being so real on here, I always enjoyed reading your posts and seeing your fabulous outfits! Wishing you the very best!
♥ perfectly Priya